Archives for posts with tag: girlfriend

Sometimes it amazes me how the smallest things can make the biggest impact.

I get one text and my world completely shifts. Just one sentence and my whole perspective on things is different. A text. That’s not supposed to happen. Not to me.

A part of me thought I was dreaming when I read it. See, I was at a party sharing a good time with my favorite people when it happened. Out of the blue is an understatement. I may as well have been completely alone in my own universe as I read it.

It took three times reading it to realize what she wrote was real. If anybody had been paying attention they would’ve seen the biggest, dumbest smile to ever cross my face.

I won’t share what was said. I’m scared of what it means. I could quite easily fall in love with this chick and that scares the hell out of me.

Being aware of how she effects me was a huge factor in the reason I haven’t told anybody about her and, of course, the text she sent on Saturday. I’m afraid if I told someone it’ll become real. That makes absolutely no sense, I know. And if it is true, I’m screwed by this post.

What’s even more fucked up is that I’m scared more of having a relationship with her and it ending badly than I am of asking her to have that relationship. What was once optimism has now turned into pessimism.

My initial instinct was to stop talking to her and just push her away. That’s easy. I can do that. I have plenty of practice doing that. Having friends not know about her makes it that much easier. So why haven’t I done that yet? I have no idea. I want to. No. I really don’t.

Maybe the hole that was dug out of my heart from years ago is slowly repairing itself. Maybe she’s helping fill the void. Maybe I actually like the feeling of this. Maybe I’m curious to see where it’ll go. Maybes are all I have right now.

I do know this though. If it ain’t broke don’t fix it. Things are going very well right now so why change them. I don’t think I will. Yet.


Couples kissingAs a proponent for being single I had an interesting thought as to why relationships are beneficial. It took an awkward exchange with one of my girl friends for this to happen but that’s besides the point. Girl friend, not girlfriend. Weird that I have those right?

Luckily enough she knows me really well and my rants don’t affect her. It’s a good thing too because I seem to do it a lot with her. After a recent spazz of mine there was a long silence from her. I thought I had done it this time. I apologized and she responded saying that I was going crazy. She was right. Apparently she let’s me go off my tangents for her amusement. Wait, wait, wait. How often do I do that? Why do I do it with her more than others? There had to be a reason for this. There had to be a blog post in this.

Men and women go crazy in their own way. We all have problems but I think men and women are affected by them differently.

The craziness of the opposite sex negates each other when they’re together. Like two negatives making a positive. Ok, maybe the craziness doesn’t go away completely but I believe with the right person it can dramatically decrease.

How does this happen? My guess is magic. Or, it could just have to do with the person being there to listen to you and vice versa.

Being able to communicate with someone that you share a special bond with is a lot different than talking to your friends. Knowing that you have someone there by your side whether present or not is also something to be considered.

It’s just the thought but who knows. There might just be something to this whole relationship thing.

As the weeks went by, hand jobs at school became a regular occurrence. Being that I had never masturbated, which meant I never experienced the joy of cumming, I was as happy as a clam. But, the natural progression of sex had something in store for me.

On a sunny afternoon in an empty room, hiding in one of the closets, Jamie started the drill of unbuttoning my pants, pulling them down and exposing my erection. This was all normal yet still fun each time but then, instead of simply jerking me off, she put her lips around the head and started using her tongue. Why didn’t I know about this sooner!? This was quite possibly the best experience I’ve had up to that point. The warmth of her mouth, the wetness, her tits, there wasn’t anything better. Or so I thought, but that’s a different story.

The feeling was so amazing I felt my legs begin to weaken. I didn’t know what was going on until I realized I hadn’t been breathing. Breathing now, and wanting to take full advantage of the situation, I removed her tight shirt and bra, revealing her breasts as she continued to suck. Leaning back, taking in this incredible view, I recorded every moment so as not to forget. If Heaven were a place on Earth, it would’ve been in that closet on that day.

The story would’ve been perfect, but as luck had it, a random kid roaming around nearly caught us in the act. Ripping through the silent ecstasy was the loud screeching of the rusty door knob to the empty room. Before I realized what was going on my pants were back on, her top covering her breasts; ending the best experience a middle schooler could ever ask for. Read the rest of this entry »

%d bloggers like this: